Dearest coworker,
Spending a month with ex-coworkers from another company, we were brought to thoughts of some of those we worked with over the past years. There was one mid-level manager who came to mind as we shared our thoughts. He was in charge of the advanced automation program that was indeed very advanced. But there was always room for improvement, and I did a report on the program for the highest general manager, pointing out some weak points, including the poor leadership of this one mid-level manager. Well, of course this mid-level manger did not like my report, likewise me.
At the next Christmas get-together, soon after the report, I walked up to the mid-level manager to tell him Merry Christmas, and as I approached, he turned his back on me, so I walked over to another coworker to share a drink with him. He had seen the mid-level manager turn, and with a concerned look explained that that was a huge insult there. I laughed and told him it only is an insult if you value the opinion of the asshole giving it. After all, the manager’s claim to fame was not his management, but getting caught getting a blowjob from the secretary when the maid walked in. And he has since died, may he rest in piece, my ex-coworker shared.
After that reminiscing, I was shopping on Amazon. I found this product and found it humorous. Then I forgot all about it, until months later while once again shopping on Amazon, it popped up as something I might still be interested in. While I was only interested from a curiosity and humor standpoint, I thought that some of my other past coworkers from a more recent company could probably make use of it – it’s for assholes that need to lighten up. The great thing, if you read the label, is that it is good for pussies as well. I thought of sending some to a couple more recent coworkers, but thought they might not realize that they actually need it. Even with the explanation that it is for assholes that need to lighten up, or just pussies.
Some of my best work memories are my recent work in a new organization long after my experiences with the manager above, and after the experiences with the jealous, terribly disloyal employees (3) in an intermediate organization, that replaced the above manager as unpleasant to deal with. There was even a recent new friendship with another coworker, since deceased, who was concerned some people don’t realize someone else is calling them an asshole. That’s when I related it’s always realized, just not a concern if you don’t value the opinion of that someone.
So, it was with a sad heart that I decided to part ways. You see, I have a good cat, Herbie. He’s a little overweight, and has your typical cat attitude – that I am here to serve just him. But, as leaving the house to return to work, he was next to the front door, in the posture he normally has while waiting to be let out. Now, it wasn’t a religious experience like being slain in the spirit by Earnest Angley, but as I went to open the door, Herbie stood on his hind legs and looked up at me. In a clear voice he asked me, “Are you going to work? Your job is to stay here and take care of me.” Taking this as a clear sign, I decided then and there not to return to work. Herbie continues to tolerate my humble servant attitude towards him, as I continue to hope one day I could rise to something more than mere toleration and be worthy to be in his presence.
Illegitimi non carborundum.
uuuuu aaaahhh 